Hi to all the tennis parents out there. Hopefully I can give you another tip to help you assist your child in becoming the best player they can be. We're going to talk about the drive home.
We all know what the drive home is. It's that long, lonely, sometimes silent, or sometimes argumentative between the child and their parent on the way home from a tennis tournament.
I used to dread getting in the car after playing a match.
There would be no music, the radio would be off and I would have to listen to my dad's thoughts about how I played. Which is never what you want to hear after you play a match. We know as a player that we don't purposely go out there to lose a match or to play badly, or to do things that our coach has been telling us not to do.
As parents we need to understand that once the match is over, it can't be replayed. I love the advice I give to the players I coach and the parents of those players. I feel like the player needs to let off steam first. When they first get off court, win or lose, they should just walk away and go through their cool down.
Don't talk to your kids straight after that match because one of the things they need to do is collect their thoughts. I always ask my players to write down their thoughts before they've talked to their parents. I want them to write down their feelings about how they felt in the match. I don't want them to relay messages to me from their parents on the way home.
Players feel what happens on the court. Parents only see it.
So it's important to understand that we want to get those players feelings, so we as coaches can understand how to help them get better.
Parents can then give their opinion as to what they saw based on the feelings of the athlete, but that's not for the car ride home. The car ride home is meant to be an enjoyable time with your kids. We don't get a lot of time to spend with our kids. Some of us work a lot and we don't get chances to do that, but when you're in the car with your kids, have quality time and be there for them. If they want to talk about their match let them talk, but that's not an opportunity for you to corner them in a space where they can't escape. It's an opportunity for you to spend some quality time and if they're upset, it's understandable.
Be there to help them and if they're happy, enjoy it with them. Don't tell them what they're doing wrong. That's a really important part is to just support them, win, lose or draw. Be there for them.