Mistakes Worth Making

Apr 27, 2020
 

Hi everyone. Thanks again for joining us here on The Tennis Menu. I want to talk today about mistakes. We generally think of mistakes as a really bad thing. We think of mistakes as something that we want to punish or we don't want as a tennis coach. We want to say "hey, that's not the right thing to do", but mistakes are how we learn.

I want to give you a story about my two young children and when they first started to walk. The first thing that happened is they fell down. They need guidance. They need to be held up. They hold themselves up on a bench table or chair to be able to achieve the outcome. They want to eventually be able to walk and what happens is they crawl first, then they hold themselves up, and then they start walking and fall over.

"When they fall over though, they get back up and try again."

What I find is that it's the 'get back up and go again' attitude that we all probably forget about. We forget about it because it was so long ago in our own development, but it's the only way we learn. We make the mistake and learn from it, so if you're a parent or a tennis coach and you've got children in front of you (whether it be on the tennis court or at home) and they do make a mistake, give them the learning from it. Don't get angry at the outcome of what happened because that sends fear into them when they do it again.

What would have happen if your mum or dad had said to you after the first time you fell down trying to walk; "Hey stop it, you're gonna hurt yourself. Don't do that again" and then gave you a smack or punished you for it?.

"You would probably never walk to this day."

We as tennis coaches and parents, or really anyone who's a leader, needs to allow people to be themselves and make some mistakes along the way. That's how we grow. That's what builds character and a strong mindset. That's what builds resilience - the ability to make a mistake, but keep going. If you think of a tennis match, where if you make a mistake there's always another point, and I think we need to treat life like that as well. We make one mistake, but it's not the be-all end-all of your life. You can then move onto the next thing or try it again and see if the outcome can change by trying something different.

So allow yourself to make mistakes. Allow your kids or the tennis players you coach to make mistakes, because it's okay to do that, it will build character. It will build resilience, and it will build a strong mindset for the future.